I will keep it pretty summarized. M and I got together. It finally happened. We spent 4 nights in a row with each other either at his house or mine. It was amazing!! He admitted to me he had feelings for me for a while and that he always thought of me. He even promised he wouldn't hurt me.
So the days were flying by and I felt like it was a fairy tale I was in! I would always ask him if it was real and he would reply with "yes as real as it can get". It was perfect. Waking up in his arms every morning was so great. When he would leave for work he would kiss me on the cheek. I can't even describe how happy I was.
Then all of the sudden, BOOM. It was over. He was avoiding me and wouldn't say more than 10 words to me even at work. So all of the sudden he tells me that work is too important as we should have known better..I was beyond crushed. I had finally gotten what I wanted and it was taken away. He promised he wouldn't hurt me then broke that promise within a week of saying it.
It's weird. I know it all happened but I've been in a horrible daze. At work and at home. I don't feel welcome around him. It's like he looks at me like an annoyance. Maybe it all happened too soon or maybe too fast. It was overwhelming. But I've made the right choice to let it go for now. It sucks but I would rather have him as a friend then nothing at all. Hopefully him and I will get out of this rut and go back to how things were before. We had such a strong friendship, that's what I'm really missing now. But what I can't get out of my head is that I know if he came up to me tomorrow and asked to try it again, I would in a heartbeat. I will wait for that day to come. I'm just a hopeless romantic...
I love this picture. He wrote it one night at work and slipped it to me. Its little things like this that I miss so much now.
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